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EQUIP: Leadership, Lead Teams, and Longevity

Wednesday, May 24th, 2017

Why Summer Camp Should Be on Your Student Ministry Calendar

Wednesday, March 22nd, 2017

For the past ten years, I have heard whispers questioning the validity of summer youth camp. As the whispers turned more frequently into questioning voices from passionate youth ministers, I felt a need to weigh-in on the subject.

Camp or no camp?
Unquestionably, all student ministry programming should be held to honest evaluation and scrutiny. Everything we calendar in the name of ministry ought to have Kingdom impact. The ministry calendar however, should not exclude a valuable tool simply because it has been around for a long time. It is tempting to board the trending train where things seasoned and aged are sometimes pronounce obsolete as it leaves the depot in search of the newest alternative. I have no dog in this fight, but I do have a lot of skin in the game so allow me give full disclosure here. I am not, nor have I ever been, paid by any camp producing entity for an endorsement. I have never served on the board of any youth camp organization or been a summer camp employee. My opinion is offered as an objective and impartial observer. So, trust me when I say . . . there are some things which almost always produce Kingdom impact if done with excellence – and I believe summer camp is one of those things – as are small groups, relationship building, and leadership development – to name a few.

Let me share four compelling reasons to incorporate summer camp into your student ministry calendar.

1. The “Get-a-way” principle: There is high value in removing people from their everyday environment, distractions, and conveniences into a focused and purposeful getaway experience. Jesus did this with His disciples for the purpose of helping them understand WHO He was, WHAT He required of them, and WHERE He was going to end up. Getting away to rest, focus, and learn is neither a new concept or all that genius – its just highly practical and valuable. That’s why fortune 500 companies take retreats, why the US Naval Academy sponsors a one week Summer Camp, and why successful companies like Chick-fil-A and Hobby Lobby utilize employee retreats to achieve their goals.

2. The “Investment” principle: Dedicating a specified time away is an investment in relationships, discipleship, leadership, and team-ship. Summer camp serves as an investment towards at least 4 of the 5 biblical purposes of student ministry: Fellowship, Worship, Discipleship, Evangelism, and Ministry Service (not a bad return for a single strategic event). If it is a mission focused camp like Mfuge, then you are likely swapping Evangelism for Ministry Service and can still achieve four of the five purposes.

3. The “Life Change” principle: The simple truth is – when lost students attend a Gospel centric summer camp with programming excellence, there is a high probability they will return home as a new creation in Christ. Of my 35 years of doing summer camp (both contract and custom built) the return is between 40-70%. Not only is the salvation potential high, but spiritual markers and faith growth spurts are more likely. When summer camp highs fade into school semester lows, it is a valid downer – admittedly, but that is not sufficient reason to kill it. Like a rubber band that expands and contracts, it does not return to the same exact form it was before being stretched.

4. The “Biggest Bang for the Buck” principle: If you add up what is spent through the church youth budget and programmed ministry event fees over one year, you will find summer camp to be a pretty good bargain. Compare YMCA camp costs at $500-$950 without leaving town and eating at home each morning and evening. The average high school sports camp runs $300-$1200 depending on the age level and does not include transportation. According to USDA healthy food facts, it cost parents between 195-$295 per week just to feed a teenager. It may be cheaper to send them to youth camp than keep them at home eating snacks between meals and consuming hot water, electricity, and fuel.

Let me share a small sampling of camps designed specifically for youth.
These camps are designed for church groups and do not allow individual camper registration. I have personally directed, spoke at, or visited each of the following camp ministries except one – Generate Camps by YM360. Generate camp made its debut in the summer of 2016 and is a trustworthy and high quality option knowing it is produced by several of the same masterminds who once produced Student Life Camps.

Contract Camps (programming, recreation, family group leaders provided)
Centrifuge Camps by Lifeway
Generate Camps by YM360
Global Youth Camps, Chattsworth, TN
Camp Anderson in Central FL
Student Life Camps by Lifeway

Summer Camp Facilities (you create your own camp from scratch)
Laguna Beach Retreat, Panama City Beach FL
Blue Horizon Lodge & Retreat, Panama City Beach FL
Springville Camp & Conference Center, Odenville, AL
Surfside Christian Retreat, Panama City Beach FL (Small – 72 beds – but directly on the beach)
Camp Lee, Anniston, AL

Several denominational conventions maintain an extensive network of camp facilities for rent. Southern Baptist have a large network of camp locations through many of their state conventions, as do Methodist and Assembly of God.

Jimmy Fallon Justin Timberlake Summer Camp Short from Charles Boyd on Vimeo.

Seven Practices of Growing Student Ministries Deeper and Wider

Wednesday, September 21st, 2016

If you have been around youth ministry very long then you have observed how some student ministries seem to grow wide but have little to show for it when it comes to growing deeply devoted followers of Christ.
On the other hand, you may have noticed that some youth ministries grow spiritual roots deeper than a Redwood tree but can’t’ seem to attract or win the lost through their efforts.
So today we are going to consider 7 essential steps you can take to grow your student ministry both deeper and wider?

The following list is a summary of sorts – a collection of responses that surfaced from a combination of student ministry consult interviews and surveys.
I have organized the list into 7 essentials found among growing youth groups. This list reflects part-time and full-time ministries without regard to the level of professional youth ministry training achieved by the volunteer or paid staff leader.

So what are these Seven Essentials for Growing Student Ministries Deeper and Wider?

The first one is
1. SMALL GROUPS: Growing student ministries focus on small group relationships as much as major event. Recognizing the important role small groups play in the spiritual development of an adolescent is a key factor to growing both numerically and spiritually. To calculate your small group effectiveness consider the ideal formula of having one small group for every 8 students in your average attendance. Each Small group should float between 5-10 students with an ideal of about 7 in attendance. Depending on the age group, interest level, and the time availability of the teacher/facilitator, one group may need to be smaller while others can afford to expand without losing the necessary high-touch factor.

If you want more info on the important role of small groups check out the training video on our YouTube channel dedicated to this topic and titled “The Importance of Small groups”

So the first essential is the importance placed upon small groups.
The second essential practice to growing deeper and wider is a focus on excellence.
2. Quality Excellence: Growing student ministries have a natural tendency towards programming excellence. The idea is that growing ministries strive for producing programming that is perceived as high quality. Regardless of whether it is or is not high quality compared to the star-powered mega-church – to the parents and youth involved in it and who serve within it – the ministry is perceived and received as programming excellence. Even if it is not Disney quality it is considered top-shelf by comparison.

So the first essential is a focus on small groups and the second is a pursuit of excellence. The 3rd essential is placing high value on involving students.
3. Growing student ministries will look for opportunities in which to place students into leadership roles. They want students to be personally involved in accomplishing their mission, vision, and weekly ministry gatherings. They know the value of students developing spiritually through doing, through preparing, and through personal involvement. This essential recognizes the fact that student leadership cannot be limited to those who play and sing with the praise band, are extrovert, or popular.

So the first essential is a focus on small groups and the second is a pursuit of excellence and the 3rd a high value placed on student involvement.

The 4th essential is to avoid failed ministry repetition.
4. Growing student ministries strive not to repeat unproductive ministry programming or events. Growth happens with those who are willing to discard or conclude a ministry that has proven unproductive over time with best effort expended to see it be successful. If you have given your best effort at making a ministry productive to no avail, then you must have the courage to discontinue it. Remember, an unproductive ministry due to programming ignorance or laziness is not the same as an unsuccessful ministry.

The 5th essential is what I call flood light encouragement.
5. Growing student ministries identify and encourage one another using a flood light rather than a spotlight. Understanding the benefits of flood light ministry is a key to high-touch growth. When we treat all students the same regardless of abilities, looks, popularity, athletic ability, etc. the tendency towards inclusiveness breeds acceptance and growth. A spotlight promotes individualism and exclusiveness much like a clique whereas a flood light distributes its beams equally regardless of how much or how little a youth brings to the table.

6. Growing student ministries will embrace and promote change. Now I don’t mean changing things for change sake (although sometimes even that is necessary in extreme stagnant cases) When it comes to change, we must remember that every ministry has its season. Some ministry programs will last a life time, like Summer Camp or Disciple Now Weekend. While the content may change and the programming updated, the concept of an annual ministry event like summer camp may outlive several generations of youth. On the other hand, some ministry initiatives have a very short life-span and are established with the intent of only accomplishing a specific, time sensitive ministry goal. Knowing when it is time to conclude a particular ministry program must be bathed in prayer and executed with humility and confidence.

The 7th and final essential to growing a student ministry deeper and wider is celebrating parent involvement.
7. Growing student ministries celebrate involvement and participation from parents and other adults. More than chaperones, these are adults who are youth friendly – who choose to invest in the spiritual development of teenagers. These are volunteers who are committed to providing students with significant other-person to which they can turn when the storms of adolescences flood their lives.

Deep and Wide . . .  its not just a kids song from days gone by.

deep-and-wide

10 Habits of Highly Successful Student Ministers

Friday, July 22nd, 2016

What is it that makes some youth ministries more successful than others? Why do some stagnate, decline or fail while others grow healthy and numerically? Is there a collection of habits that successful or exceptional student ministers practice? In our survey and interviews we have found ten practices that stand out as doable and adaptable for just about any student minister.Vintage scooter guy
For this study I focused on two criteria for classifying a student ministers as highly exceptional. Managing a growing student ministry for at least three years. I chose three years for two reasons.
1. First, the 3 year mark is just under the cut-off of the average length of stay for paid student ministers in the US (3.9 yrs).
2. Second, the 3 year mark helps prevent a skewed result from those who have not managed or built a ministry but rather inherited the kingdom, so to speak. Growth for one year – good for you! Growth for two years – awesome! Growth for three years – now we might just have the real deal going on here!

Let’s take a look at these habits and practices.

1. They Exercise: While this is probably not what you were expecting to top the list it is a reality of healthy youth ministers and ministries. Youth pastors who remain active through a sport, hobby, exercise routine, running club, organized leagues, etc. were more likely to remain satisfied in their position and be successful in the youth ministry arena.

2. They Celebrate: Not only do they celebrate the involvement and victory of volunteers, parents, and student leaders, they also celebrate big and little victories in the lives of students, families, and major ministry events. The celebratory factor creates a reputation of joy and excitement radiating from a winning team.

3. They Are Not Afraid to Fail: Successful student ministry ships are captained by those who are not afraid to attempt something new or extraordinary. It is not that they are never afraid but rather they make a habit of overcoming fear in order to experiment with change or create something from scratch. They do not allow fear keep them from what could make the ministry successful.

4. They Are Confident: This is not the same as being arrogant but more akin to being secure – in what they know, who they serve and how they will organize the ministry God has entrusted to their care. Since the church already suffers from an overabundance of arrogant leadership, we should strive to balance the scales with humble confidence.

5. They Plan and Administrate Well: Over the years student ministers have acquired quite a reputation for being disorganized. I think it suffice to say that if you want to succeed in student ministry you will either organized, plan, and manage out of a natural skill set or you will force yourself to learn, adapt and acquire the needed skills to plan and manage well. Otherwise, you will become a casualty of chaos or burn-out.

6. They Prioritize Well: Successful student ministers have a habit of putting family in the correct biblical order – ahead of ministry. Some of the most frustrated people in the world are spouses of student pastors and often the root of a premature exit. Too often student ministers appear better at managing the ministry calendar than their marriage and families. It must be both/and.

7. They Maintain a Devotional Prayer Life: It is no surprise that successful student ministers hold their daily devotional time in high regard. They insist upon nurturing an ongoing devotional commitment. It is the one thing, no matter what comes, must be retained, restarted, reignited, and reestablished however many times it takes to preserve it.

8. They Are Not Afraid to Ask for Help: While this may appear surprising to some, most youth ministers realize how much pride exist among ministers. This is especially true among youth ministers who are often times young, inexperienced, and highly pressured to produce. This can lead to a reluctance to ask for help for fear of appearing inept. Successful student leaders know when it is time to get assistance and they are not too shy or proud to ask for it.

9. They Listen More Than They Talk: While this is a valued trait in any profession, it is especially beneficial in the world of student ministry. Listening is paramount among those who serve teenagers as teens need to express their thoughts, be heard, and listened to. Often youth are learning about themselves when they are talking, and listening will deliver a truck-load of insight.

10. They Know the Team They Are On is More Important than the Team They Lead: One of the realities of successful ministry enjoyment is arriving at the conclusion that the staff team is more essential to your success and happiness than the youth staff or volunteer team you direct. While both are certainly important, one must take priority and that one is the pastor and staff you serve alongside.

“For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” Hebrews 12:11

“Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.” I Cor. 9:24-27

IS TIME ON YOUR SIDE?

Wednesday, April 8th, 2015

How much of it do you have? According to The World Health Organization the United States ranks 36th in Life Expectancy out of 193 countries. This means the average male in the US can expect to live 78.3 years while females can expect to outlast their male counterparts to age 81.3. By contrast the average male in Kenya plans his last birthday at age 60 while the average male living in Sierra Leone may not see his 40th birthday. If you live approximately 78 years and enjoy the average number of hours per sleep per day (9) then you will have consumed approximately 427,050 hours of discretionary time or about 48 years.

Most of us do take the time we do have for granted but in the world of youth ministry we must not waste it on things that do not have or lead to Kingdom impact. One of the major reasons is because youth pastors have a maximum of seven years to leverage against the development of the students entrusted to their ministry care. In most cases, students are entering and exiting the student ministry arena at different ages making our time for impact even more precarious.

So we return to the initial question: How much time do you have? Unless you know precisely when you are going to die you cannot answer the question with any certainty.
Let me encourage you to guard your time by practicing three important Time Management Tips.

Considering the minutes God entrust to your care, be sure to:
A. Manage it WELL – Because . . .
• Time is finite.
• You only have so much of it.
• The amount you do have is unknown.
• It is a non-renewable resource.
• When it is gone it’s gone for good.

B. Manage it SMART – Be careful not to allow your time to manage you. Instead, take control of your calendar as a smart steward distinguishing between that which is tentative and which is necessary. With all the modern technology available to assist with managing work and personal calendars, there remains far too many poor time managers. I am amazed at the number of managers (ministry and secular) who for whatever reason find themselves missing meetings, double booking, and over committing.
I have college-age and young adult colleagues who can access and demonstrate a thousand apps on the newest smart phone or tablet but can’t arrive to a meeting on time or make notes to remember what decisions were made during a planning session.
One student minister expressed that he would be a much better time manager if his computer did not also house his favorite games. His distraction and addiction to gaming competition was a hindrance to his smartly managing his time.

C. Manage it BIBLICALLY – Remember, your time is not your own.
• You are accountable to God for the time He graciously bestows you.
• You are accountable to your supervisor for how you spend it.
• You are accountable to you family for how you prioritize it.

Spending plenty of time in the scriptures will make you and your ministry significantly stronger. Take your student-targeted sermons seriously. If you are writing from scratch, good for you but don’t feel guilty for using ministry tools for sermon ideas and outlines. Conversely, if you mostly use or only use ministry tools for downloading sermon outlines and scripts – please, please write something original. Not only will it ignite a passion to preach what God gives you but it makes you a better persuader of the Gospel. Remember, only the scriptures through His divine revelation can change the heart of a student, a student minister or a student ministry.

“Making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” Ephesians 5:16

“So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12

“The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” Proverbs 16:9

“Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time.” Colossians 4:5

“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” 1 Corinthians 10:31
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Dilbert Time Management short from Charles Boyd on Vimeo.

Education . . . the road less traveled

Tuesday, January 6th, 2015

According to Ken Kaegler’s study of Youth Leaders who were fired or burned out 85% are graduates of a college or University. Of those who hold a degree, 49% have an emphasis or specialization in Youth Ministry. This means 15 of 100 youth ministers have no college level training and of those who do hold a college degree over half have no specialized training for the work of student ministry.  Developing core competencies for student ministry service has never been more accessible yet many student leaders seem to be opting out of the academic component. Isn’t it enough that you love Jesus and love teenagers – well . . . NO it isn’t? The church deserves your best as do the staff, pastor, parents and students. From self-education to formal degrees you are the only one who can prevent you from becoming an expert in student ministry. To this end, consider obtaining as much training as you can. Perhaps a list of options can help you achieve your next goal.

  1. Attend a National Youth Workers Convention
  2. Adopt a mentor who has the degree and experience from you can draw.
  3. Observe and glean from a successful ministry in action.
  4. Enroll in an institute for greater credentials and skill honing.
  5. Network through professional youth ministry journals and culture experts.
  6. Subscribe to helpful blogs and webinars.
  7. Finish college or seminary.
  8. Audit a student ministry course.

Do whatever you can in pursuit of becoming an expert in your field. Commit to becoming a life-long learner of the ministry you serve.

Consider the following two options.

  1. Self-education:The primary idea here is to take the initiative to train yourself. You are either a window or an obstacle to learning. a) Research learning – this might include books, how-to resources, insightful blogs, websites, etc.  b) Mentor-ship – no one person can provide you all the mentor-ship you need so don’t look for “a” mentor but rather several mentor outlets who will allow you to become a sharecropper of sorts as you harvest from their field of knowledge and experience.
  2. Formal Education:If you have not been to college consider enrolling. If you are currently in school consider taking youth ministry electives or pursuing a youth ministry major. If you need to go back to school, enroll as soon as feasible. There are so many great online options through today’s technology that few excuses are credible.

Let be share three cautions:

  1. Don’t become a “download dog”. If the foundation of your ministry revolves around a downloadable file then you need to upgrade your level of expertise. Too often there is the temptation to google it, copy it and voila, your good to go for another Wednesday night. Let me encourage you to be a content creator. There is significant benefit in creating your own content and this generation appreciates it because they are themselves by nature content creators. In fact give them a seat at the creation table and allow them opportunity to produce student ministry content.
  2. A degree is not a magic wand. Having a degree does have its advantages but anyone can testify to the fact that a degree alone will not create success. There are plenty of ineffective ministry ships being captained by someone holding a college degree. Simply having a degree does not make you an effective student pastor but it does give you the knowledge base to become one.
  3. Don’t do nothing. Next year will arrive whether you advance your expertise level or not. Why not ring in the New Year knowing that you have taken concrete steps towards increasing your competence level.

Education is knowledge and those who lead God’s people have prayed for such a blessing as to know more about how to lead His people, obey His word, govern His leadership, and exemplify His will. May it be so with you as you seek knowledge for your position.

“Give me wisdom and knowledge, that I may lead this people, for who is able to govern this great people of yours?” II Chronicles 1:10

“The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge, for the ears of the wise seek it out.” Proverbs 18:15

“Teach me knowledge and good judgment, for I trust your commands.” Psalm 119:66

Cruise Control and Leadership

Sunday, October 26th, 2014

Twitter nameAccording to the US Patient Office, cruise control (also called speedostat #2519859) was developed in 1948 by inventor and mechanical engineer Ralph Teetor. With the oil crisis of 1973 cruise control became a popular option for saving gas and soon offered as standard equipment by the mid 1970’s. Of course the beauty of this technological marvel of speed regulation is that you can simply set it and forget it . . . at least for a while.

Cruise ControlCruise control allows drivers to direct less effort in getting where they want to go and endure less stress in the process. However, it also produced an unforeseen consequence – getting so comfortable that paying close attention to safety becomes ancillary.

In student ministry be careful not to set the cruise control. Instead strive to lead your ministry out of imaginative priority rather than dutiful auto-pilot. Leading from imagination and excitement is more productive and healthy than leading from memory. The goal is to help create and shape the future rather than simply repeating the past. It is tempting to operate a student ministry from the cruise control – set  it and forget it . . . letting it run until it needs your attention at a critical moment. Unfortunately there are too many student ministers who have set the cruise control and except for a few increases and decreases in speed, it remains pretty much the same ministry. The faces change with incoming sixth graders and outgoing graduates but otherwise it remains very similar.  How can you tell if your ministry is running on cruise control?

Seven major indicators that your student ministry cruise control may be engaged.

  1. Your sermons more often come from your archive file than your study file.
  2. The only thing you changed on the student ministry calendar was the year . . . again.
  3. New faces come mostly on fifth grade promotion day.
  4. The good news is that there is no bad news.
  5. You don’t remember the process for scheduling youth for baptism.
  6. The youth worship order is a template that requires only song title changes.
  7. All your student leaders are veterans.

Three suggestions to help disengage the cruise control.

  1. Calendar with Purpose: Don’t just repeat ministry events because the dates roll around. Consider the needs of the students, parents, and the targeted lost community. Let the purpose dictate the calendar rather than the calendar dictate the purpose.
  2. Calendar with Passion: Create a platform where creative minds offer alternative ministry ideas that bring passion and urgency to reaching students with the Gospel.
  3. Calendar with Vision: Plan your ministry calendar with an eye towards the future rather than the past. Only repeat ministry events that produce progress in achieving the ministry vision and goals. Don’t be afraid to drop something from your ministry calendar, especially if it does not require a ministry to produce it.

If you need a break from the face pace of ministry management then let your volunteer team step up to assume some of the heavy lifting for a few weeks. It might be tempting to set the cruise control and step away but remember the long-term success of your ministry and your health depends on your being engaged and invested personally. Cruise control is great as long as it is not your priority plan for executing student ministry.

Cruise Control from Charles Boyd on Vimeo.

“Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve.” Colossians 3:23-24

“The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, But the soul of the diligent is made fat.” Proverbs 13:4

Small Groups are Never out of Style

Saturday, October 18th, 2014

How important are small groups in student ministry – well, I think they are so important that I’m not sure it can be Small Grouparticulated in a short while. Whether you are the youth pastor, small group leader or potential volunteer candidate, I want to share with you a dozen benefits teenagers receive from the ministry of small group leaders:
  1. They have another significant adult caring about what they do and the decisions they make.  I once heard Psychologist Dr. James Dobson report that 40% of kids are born into homes with no father to mentor them, correct them or cheer them on and that every ado adolescent needs a “significant other” adult willing to journey with them for the sake of what I call the THREE “C”s  Challenging, Correcting and Cheering.
  2. Youth receive weekly encouragement to grow spiritually from someone other than mom or dad. Let’s face it, there is only so much mom and dad can say and only so long it will be heard before the ears of a teenager become supersaturated with the do’s and donts during adolescent development. Small group leaders bridge that gap for parents and in the cases where spiritual parenting and modeling is absent, the gap they fill is quite significant!
  3. Small group leaders provide an important support beam when hurricane force winds blow through the life of a teen. An invested connected parent and youth leader simply cannot meet the needs of enough students – they need help from committed small group leaders.
  4. Youth receive an encouraging word or a smiling face at sporting events or other type activities.  A caring presence from non-relatives is a KEY player in keeping them on the right side of the road or correcting their actions when needed.
  5. Youth get to connect with an adult who is truly excited to see them at church.
  6. Youth are NOTICED when they are not present in small group and they respond positively when they realized their presence is NOT Incidental or taken for granted.
  7. Students benefit from of the voice of affirmation – whether a text, tweet, facebook, phone message or old fashioned snail mail note – they cant help but know invested small group leaders care and will not give up on them.
  8. Students need a “neutral adult”  for practical life issues – being too close to the situation makes a parent vulnerable to emotional rule. A small group leader can support the parents from one step outside the boxing ring.
  9. Only in small group can a student find the connection deep enough to have a SAFE place or person in time of need.
  10. Youth are accounted for in small group – from a practical management side, they are noticed when present and when not present. Small group leaders provide the ultimate management system for the youth ministry.
  11. Only in small group can spiritual truths be planted using the highest retention rate methods. Its these teaching methods that provide future Holy spirit recall moments.
  12.  If you want your students to become fully devoted followers of Christ INVEST in small group and small group leaders.Twitter name
“And they, continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart.” Acts 2 :46
“For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.” Matthew 18:20
Spoon game after guys small group – vimeo

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Three Types of Lies

Wednesday, September 10th, 2014

When it comes to being truthful we naturally check the box that says “Always.” Why is it so important to always be truthful? Is it as simple as because it is the right thing to do? Well, yes and no. Consider four reasons to be an automatic truth teller.Pinocchio First, we strive to be truthful because we know that is the example of our Lord. “Let your yes be yes and your no be no” . . . Matthew 5:37. If we are to be imitators then we must tell the truth. Second, we pursue honesty in all situations because we want our witness to be above reproach 100% of the time. “So that you can remain blameless and pure among a warped and crooked generation.” Philippians 2:15. Our witness and productivity as a kingdom builder demands absolute integrity. Third, we aim for truthfulness because we are trying to set a good example for the students we lead, the parents we equip and the team we serve alongside. “The integrity of the upright shall guide them”. . . Proverbs 11:3. Fourth, we pursue honesty simply because the bible dictates that we be truthful. “Speaking the truth in love” . . . Ephesians 4:15. We should strive for character of honesty so pure that that being so seems like second nature or unnatural to do otherwise. We want to be careful not to do or say things that students recognize as less than truthful. Sometimes it is tempting to do something simply for shock-value rather than truth value. Be careful if you find yourself venturing down this road because the “shock” might be found in the pastor’s office and the “value” may be a lesson hard learned and pricy. Strive to hold yourself to the same truth standard as you do for students and volunteers. As I consider the simple Christian necessity of being a truthful person I am reminded of at least five situations when it is incredibly tempting to tell something other than or less than the truth.

  1. When you are about to look bad in front of the pastor and staff.
  2. When your integrity for telling the truth will be overshadowed by the consequences of the truth you tell.
  3. When someone you highly respect will probably think less of you after they hear the truth.
  4. When telling the truth will hurt someone you care deeply about.
  5. When telling the truth might lead to your being rightly or wrongly relieved of your ministry position.

From my own children to intern staff and students I have continually taught that there are three categories of lies. Consider the following and see if there be any truth to these three types of falsehoods. 1. WHOPPERS: Telling something you know is false. This is when you deliberately tell something that you know to be untrue. It could be completely fabricated, the opposite of what occurred or embellished beyond recognition.  Example: Supervisor ask: Are all the chaperons on this list cleared through the required background check?  Reply: Yes! (but you do not know that for certain – you only intend for each chaperon to be background checked before you leave on the trip- your hope is they will each be cleared but they are not yet cleared) 2. HALF BAKED: Telling only part of what you know to be true. This is perhaps a technical truth but because the information is incomplete the listener is led to believe something less than the truth. Anything less than the whole truth is simply not the truth. Example: Supervisor ask: Did you clean the vans after camp like the transportation policies require?  Reply: Yes sir, I sure did. (but the rest of the story is that the vans were cleaned out but not until after the Sr. Adults used them.) 3. THE SOUND of SILENCE: Remaining silent when confronted with a search for the truth is equal to a lie. Keeping quiet in hope that no one will ask the right question requiring you to speak the truth has the same consequence as an outright lie. In this case, the silence leads directly to a different conclusion than if you had spoken up. When you know the truth about something and simply remain silent leading others to assume or conclude something other than the truth, it is a lie sown in silence. There is a lot of pressure to “produce” in student ministry but when it comes to being truthful about challenges, mishaps, wrong decisions or even results; there is never a good reason to be anything other than completely truthful, honest and forthright. There may be three categories of lies but there is only one category truth and He delights in lips that speak truth. “Righteous lips are the delight of a king, and he loves him who speaks what is right.” Proverbs 16:13 “Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who act faithfully are his delight.” Proverbs 12:22 “Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.” I John 3:18

Communicating with the Big Dog

Wednesday, August 20th, 2014

 

Keeping your supervisor abreast of your vision and plans can save you a lot of time and frustration. Think of the time you spend Informing and sharing as an investment account that grows over time. It may be only a duty in the beginning but eventually it grows into something worth a great deal. You not only build trust but you build a rapport and maybe even a friend.


Don’t reach too high on the ladder of expectation on this one but there are some pastors who are friends with their student minister and hold the ministry to students and the student pastor himself in high regard as he executes his ministry faithfully and professionally under the umbrella of the church.

Some student ministers and supervisors even enjoy a relationship that supersedes the ministry they share. The time and frustration you will save in the long run will far outweigh the time and energy you spend connecting with and relating it to your supervisor.  When occasion arises or when you create the occasion, run your ideas by your supervisor to get input and feedback. Sure, you may get nothing but that’s ok. Maybe your supervisor is a bit out of touch or a generational leftover who identifies more with “uncle Rico” than cutting edge cultural trends but his friendship and approval can still be an asset to you.

Let me share four compelling reasons why it is worth your effort to pursue the best communication possible with your supervisor.

  1. Essential Chain of Command: Sharing information upstream is simply the right way of doing things. If it is not in your job description it should be. Keeping your supervisor informed is not just the right thing to do, it communicates respect, courtesy, and competence. As information flows up and down the communication chain and you do not want to be the weak link in that chain.
  1. Essential to Your Success: it is nearly impossible for you to be highly successful at your ministry job without your supervisor’s support. You may be good at your job. You may even possess the potential for being Moses of the youth group but without the support of your supervisor, your ministry will be less than it could be and your headaches more frequent than they need be. Our research indicates those student ministers who enjoy regular communication with their supervisor are less likely to be terminated or experience premature ministry exit. Our research also reveals that 100% of youth ministers prefer communication over termination.
  1. Essential for Protection: Your supervisor can not protect you from the accidents that occur in student ministry if he is not aware of what is going on. He cannot protect you from negative or ill-informed members who turn on you or share misinformation. Even if he does step up to provide a shield and buckler for your defense he may be forced to do it blindly if he is not informed. It makes him look bad if he does not know the situation so he is inclined to either throw you under the bus so you can learn a lesson in communication or defend you and risk his reputation. Without a relationship and track record of good communication and sound judgment, he is less likely to do the latter.
  1. Essential for Promotion: There will be many times when you will need extra promotion for a student ministry happening. Few people can speak directly to the hearts of senior adults and parents of youth like the senior pastor or administrator. And if they are not routinely seen promoting the student ministry (which would be rare) then their voice of promotion and support will be even louder among the masses. Your supervisor most likely runs in circles to which you have little access no time to cultivate so consider him to be an extension of your promotion and marketing arm.

If you are convinced of these four essentials truths, then cultivate the relationship with your supervisor. Figure out their leadership style, how they like to receive information, when they like to digest new ideas, when timing is best and worse, and how he enjoys relating to you.

”My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. 21 Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.” James 1:19-21

“Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.” Hebrews 13:17

“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. 25 For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality.” Colossians 3:23-25

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